Miah- Pointing to her scrapbook "China Mommy. Stay China"
Me-"Yes your China Mommy is in China"
Miah- Pointing to me " Miah Mommy Stay"
Me-"Yes Mommy will stay with Miah"
Miah-"Mommy stay Miah" Points to scrapbook "China Mommy. Stay China"
It breaks my heart that a two year old has to even think about such things and that she feels the need at such a young age to confirm that her Mommy is staying with her. I tell her everyday that mommy will come back when I need to go out without her. I pray that soon she will have the secure assurance that I will not leave her and that soon her biggest worry in life will be no more than how to make a good mud pie or how to not get caught stealing the last cookie!
Did I mention that I cannot wait until this child is potty trained?
Thanks for sharing the conversation Miah and you had today - I guess this might be just around our corner too.
ReplyDeleteI hear you on the toilet training. I have Sylvie convinced now "No Touch" the toilet paper. However, I'm counting my blessings, she has yet to think of putting any toys in the toilet. Let's hope it stays that way. ;)
What a precious (and heartbreaking) conversation.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the post, its a good reminder that nomatter how young Ping is that these *big* thoughts are going through her mind. She needs that reaffirming of her permanancy with us.
ReplyDeleteOH Kim--so amazing she can express these questions and feelings to you! I too am so seriously aware of the processing that's going on in Izabella's head and worry--and even worry about how she feels about me, remembering that I God chose her for us--but she really didn't have a choice in the matter at all! I just posted this morning about this very subject. Seems we don't just share an LID, and the blessing of a daughter from China--we also carry the same thoughts and feelings in our heads and hearts--daily. I have edited it a couple times this morning already--cause I'm not sure it says exactly how I feel and what I'm thinking--but it's close. I wanted to write these feelings down--because they are feelings I didn't expect to have. And wonder if others feel the same way. And want Izabella to know always--that I did not take my relationship with her for granted or expected anything--and always am aware of how she must be feeling--even if I can't completely know--only she really knows. This is especially raw for me--because she was with her birthparents for the first 10 months and that is huge in her experience.
ReplyDeletehttp://cotaarndtadd1.blogspot.com/2010/05/stranger-called-mommy.html
Potty Training--yes--it's crazy. Izabella too loved to play with the TP. We always sit with her--sometimes it's a while in there with her. Then we started telling her to tell us when she's done. Then she started telling us to "go away." Then I realized--after I returned one time to a TP mess (although not quite this bad--yipes--Miah had a blast) that we needed to pull the TP off the holder and out of her reach for these times. :) Still have to do that--even now that she's potty trained.
She will get there--and it will happen over night. It got to the point for us when I realized she knew when her body was telling her she needed to go--and she was just being lazy when the following things happened: We'd ask her if she needed to go, she'd say no and then go a in her diaper a few minutes later. I started giving her an option of Diapers or "Big Girl Panties" and she'd always pick the diapers--but would complain they were un-comfortable. So--one day after a "peeing on the carpet incident" I stopped giving her an option of diapers and gave her an option of two different pairs of "big girl" undies. And told her diapers were for "night, night" only. And with the exception of a couple accidents--she's doing amazingly great! So...all kids are different..it's so hard to know when and what to do. But we all know, "this too will pass." Just not soon enough sometimes. :)
I hate potty training too! I feel for you...
ReplyDeleteThat is amazing that Miah is expressing herself like this. When we say anything to Lilah, she looks at us with a completely blank stare. When she sees a picture of her foster family, she doesn't know who they are and says they are strangers... I think she is still suppressing things somewhat, but slowly I think things will come back to her and she will be willing to talk about them. It is funny how the brain works to protect itself.
That picture is a riot. And, what a sweet early conversation. I wonder what conversations are ahead of me!
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